The Childfree Life

When having it all, means not having kids
It is currently Fri Dec 13, 2019 4:15 pm

All times are UTC-07:00




Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 14 posts ]  Go to page 1 2 Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Sat Nov 30, 2019 9:40 am 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jan 26, 2019 10:30 am
Posts: 43
https://www.cbc.ca/passionateeye/featur ... e-a-mother

I'm looking forward to watching this documentary - heads up Canadians, it's on tonight on The Passionate Eye.

I should know better, but I read the comments accompanying this article (I like to see how many commenters are actually enlightened and how many are idiots) and of course many ignorant people talk about how this woman will have regrets as she nears 40, that she's missing out, blah blah blah. A lot of these ignoramuses also take issue with the fact that she says she knew at age 5 she didn't want kids. When I think back to my childhood, I had no interest in playing with baby dolls. I remember once that I tried to get into it since everyone else was - I had my mother buy me a bunch of accessories for a doll I had lying around. She got me diapers and a bottle and various things and I tried to play with the doll but I got bored so fast. I much preferred Barbies, because my Barbie could have as exciting a life as I wanted her to, and she didn't require a baby to tote around. When I played, Barbie's "story" always ended happily ever ever with a wedding to Ken, but never with parenthood. Anyway, that's who I was at 5. And there are scores of kids out there who don't get a thrill from playing "house" in the traditional way we were expected to when we were kids.

How about you? Were there signs when you were a kid that you were destined to be childfree?


Top
   
PostPosted: Sat Nov 30, 2019 10:34 am 
Offline

Joined: Sun Jun 10, 2018 6:50 am
Posts: 59
same here, I never liked playing with dolls, but I loved my stuffed toy animals. For me it was always clear that I would not have children, as far as I can remember back there was never a point at which I did want to be a mother.


Top
   
PostPosted: Sat Nov 30, 2019 11:52 am 
Offline

Joined: Thu Nov 22, 2018 7:22 pm
Posts: 22
^^I understand your comment. I liked stuffed animals much more than any dolls. For the most part, the few dolls I do remember playing with were similar in age to me (when I got them) and closer to a peer than a potential child.

I seem to currently be on the boarder when it comes to people's attitude towards my age vs. potential children. There are some that still play the "you'll change your mind when you have your own" card and others that realize I'm serious when they find out my numeric age or that I'm dating someone who also doesn't want kids.


Top
   
PostPosted: Sat Nov 30, 2019 2:19 pm 
Offline
Moderator
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2018 6:00 am
Posts: 695
Location: UK
I genuinely believe I was born knowing I didn't want kids, never at any age was I interested or even contemplated it. I must have been about 4 or 5 when I was given a doll, the first, last and only one I ever remember having....I recall eyeing my brother (15 years my senior) who'd given it to me with a look of what can only be described as WTF? I think I ended up taking it to bits and poking it around with a compass.

I always prefer toys that did things; etch-a-sketch, spirograph, chemistry sets, geometry sets (I'd sit for hours drawing circles and measuring angles) and reading anything and everything......very gender neutral stuff. I was also an inveterate experimenter and maker (and breaker to see how they work) of things....I still am.

I don't understand why it's OK to say 'oh I always knew I wanted to be a mother' but it's not OK to say 'I always knew I'd stab myself in the head before I became a mother', usual double standard bollocks.

I don't think it's that unusual to 'have always known' , most CF people I know never had any great deliberation on the subject, they mostly just knew.

_________________
Too bright to breed


Top
   
PostPosted: Sat Nov 30, 2019 8:01 pm 
Offline
Moderator
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2018 5:25 am
Posts: 1721
Quote:
How about you? Were there signs when you were a kid that you were destined to be childfree?
Yeah, I've never liked kids, even when I was one. :lol:

That sounds funny, but it's true. There were plenty of times in school where other kids would be hamming it up, or roughhousing, or doing any of a number of other "kid" things, and I'd think, "Gawd, what a bunch of morons...kids are so stupid!"

I also distinctly remember a time in 5th grade (so 10 or 11 years old) where our teacher was very much into the "break into teams and do this activity," where I much, much preferred to work alone and pass or fail through my own effort.

Anyway, I'd just about had it with having to interact with these other kids all the damn time, and I got to class, and she started in with assigning us to groups to play some kind of educational board games, and I just flipped my shit left, right, and center.

I started screaming, crying, cussing, kicking, and fighting that I wasn't playing any goddamn stupid games with a bunch of goddamn stupid kids and I was damn well sick and tired of constantly being surrounded and pestered and otherwise put upon by a bunch of thick-skulled dipshits, and just leave me the hell alone and I'll do my damn homework over here by myself, if you don't mind!

Keep in mind, up to that point, I was the most agreeable, quietest kid in the class, but I'd just finally had it up to here with being forced to hang around these other kids all day. Why? Because they were kids, and I HATE KIDS!!!

_________________
"There is no bad weather, only bad clothes." - Unknown


Top
   
PostPosted: Tue Dec 03, 2019 7:00 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Aug 28, 2018 11:34 am
Posts: 271
Another member of the no-dolls club here. I think there were a few in the house, but they were all hand-me-downs from my older sister and I didn't really play with them much. They eventually got donated to Goodwill, I think.

I was into playing outside, drawing, reading, working with clay...a lot of the stuff LaT mentioned. Honestly I'm not sure if this was CF leanings, or just that my siblings and I were raised in pretty gender-neutral ways when it came to play and household stuff. Same for chores, too. We all learned from preschool age to help with various household and yard tasks, and by middle school we were all doing the same chores mom and dad did, including mowing the lawn, cooking dinner, tending to pets, etc.

I don't remember a lot from when I was really tiny, but I do remember one day in preschool when I watched some girls playing house, complete with baby dolls. I thought it looked boring and wondered why they'd choose that. It was free time, when we could go to any area to play, as long as we cleaned up when the teacher rang the bell. Why pick dolls and house when there were tools/carpentry, a tree-house fort, giant blocks, etc.? I remember running off to build stuff with the tools.


Top
   
PostPosted: Wed Dec 04, 2019 8:57 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Jun 11, 2018 4:00 pm
Posts: 809
Location: Ontario, Canada
I knew from a very, very young age that I never wanted kids. I honestly can’t remember how young I was when I first expressed my disinterest in kids. I do recall at one point thinking I would have them when I grew up, because it’s what happens when you grow up - but I changed my mind pretty much as soon as I realized I had a choice in the matter.

I’m another one that never played with dolls. I had a couple, and they mostly sat around, or their accessories (like the beautiful wooden bassinet my uncle made) ended up being used for stuffed animals.

I actually have one very distinct memory involving dolls - I think I was maybe 6 or 7 when this happened. I was playing with my best friend, who loved dolls (she has always wanted kids and has a baby now). She wanted to play dolls, so I said ok. She got her doll and I got my doll. I distinctly remember watching her play with her doll and copying what she was doing, because I had absolutely no idea how to play with a doll. The whole concept of pretending you had a baby was completely foreign to me.


Top
   
PostPosted: Thu Dec 05, 2019 5:53 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jan 26, 2019 10:30 am
Posts: 43
CarryOn I had similar tendencies re: not liking kids even when I was a kid. I was always annoyed when I was playing with friends and their younger sibling butted in and wanted to play with us. And around age 11-13 when my friends wanted to take the babysitting course, I was baffled because I just didn't like being around little kids. I had no desire to look after them!


Top
   
PostPosted: Fri Dec 06, 2019 3:19 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Thu Aug 30, 2018 7:03 am
Posts: 28
Quote:
Yeah, I've never liked kids, even when I was one. :lol:

Me! I hated kids when I was a kid. Also, LaT, I had a killer biology/microscope set. I catalogued our entire backyard using index cards. I wrote down the traits of plants and drew pix of their details found under the microscope. I put them in an index card box. I so wish I still had all of that.

I was in a meeting the other day in one of our science labs with high-end research microscopes. The professor was preparing for a quiz and had various plants, fruits, and nuts out for students to analyze. I so wanted to participate.


Top
   
PostPosted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 5:01 am 
Offline

Joined: Fri Jun 15, 2018 3:35 am
Posts: 17
I don't remember much about how I felt about babies as a kid. I know I at least had a cabbage patch doll I played with. But I remember all of the stuffed animals I had. My favorite one was a stuffed dog called Borregard. He was my watchdog. :)


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 14 posts ]  Go to page 1 2 Next

All times are UTC-07:00


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Limited