The Childfree Life

Ah, yes,,, the enforced merriment... Maybe you should have someone text or call you about 5 mins into it with an "emergency"... We've been known to do that with colleagues to get them away from pesky visitors...

Talking of dreams.....

I had a really odd one last night.

There were 4 legless (as in they had no legs, not pissed as farts) baby mice that had been drowned in a yellow, plastic dog bowl, which was in the kitchen. Their parents were there too, in and around the bowl and I was trying to figure out if they were trying to save them, or they had deliberately drowned them as an act of kindness.

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Too bright to breed

Ewww. That's weird.

I was telling one of the girls at the gym that before my last comp, I had a dream where I snatched the bar (pulled it from the floor to over my head) and one of my arms ripped off. The bar and my arm flew away somewhere behind me, and I stood looking at my empty arm socket and thinking "That's weird. There should be blood". Too funny!

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Some people meditate. Some people caffeinate and vegetate.

I'm still laughing at "pissed as farts".

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The admin formerly known as Force10

I'm on a cooking forum, and I have to say, there's one member who really irritates me.

Her member name is her kid's name, as in "JoelysMom," and if that weren't bad enough, *every goddamn post she makes* is phrased in such a way as to include her stupid kid.

Post a picture of a meal, and she'll say, "Joely and I think that looks great!" Ask a question about a method or ingredient, "I don't know about your area, but here in Anytown, Joely and I can find these in the International aisle at Meijer's!"

Every. Fucking. Post! It's maddening!

Also, whenever she does post a photo, her dipshit kid is always in it. Literally no one else on the site does that. No one. Everyone else, it's simply a pic of the dish (like I post here), or something else food-related, like a pic of a kitchen remodeling project or an ingredient.

Not her. Pic of some Thai dish...it's the plate with her stupid kid with her toothy stupid smile plastered right next to it, and some inane comment like, "Making Thai tonight, Joely has exotic tastes! No PB&J for Joely!"

What's worse, there's no way to block anyone on the forum.

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"There is no bad weather, only bad clothes." - Unknown

^ I have quit/ left/ unfollowed/ unfriended/ blocked various forums/ groups/ pages/ 'friends' for exactly THAT reason over the years. I just couldn't stand it any longer. You can have kids shoved down your throat in the most unlikely of places on the net and once one of the Moos starts, others follow in their weird little out-doing-each-other competition. What's even worse than Moos are grandparents..... they are in a league of their very own.

Saturday afternoon grocery shopping, couldn't be avoided. The worst part, though, was a mom and kid at the deli counter.

It's Saturday, about 2:30PM, it's fucking packed. Like a mob of people six deep.

They were next to me, their number one after mine. I could hear mom whispering to her kid, who was probably six or seven. After a minute, I could tell what was coming.

My number got called, they'd started filling my order, and another worker called the mom next to me.

Sure enough, just as I suspected, this happened:

"May I help you?"

"Go on, Kayley, go on! Tell her what you want!"

"I...want...I...um...I want..."

"Tell her you want the Wildflower Honey Ham...!"

"I want the...what is it, Mom, I can't 'member!"

"Wildflower..."

"Oh, yeah...Wildfower..."

"Honey..."

"Honey..."

"Ham!"

"Ham!"

Then they had to go through the same rigmarole for how much she wanted, then a third time for how she wanted it sliced.

At the deli, they always bring you the first slice to ok it and offer it as a sample. The deli worker didn't even get a chance to offer:

"How does that look, sweetie? Is that thin enou-"

ZAM! That kid was off the floor and up the deli case like a raccoon shot out of a cannon. Her eating habits, needless to say, were disgusting, smacking her lips loudly and shouting with her mouth full, "THIS IS GOOD, MOMMY!"

Oh, FFS. I'm just glad I got my order in before them. I even heard the guy on my other side whisper to his wife, "We could order, do the rest of the shopping, and be home before she gets through it."

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"There is no bad weather, only bad clothes." - Unknown

So, if America is now "Full", does that mean Americans can't have any more kids??

Ever notice it's the same people who whine about immigration who also whine that people are not having enough kids?

I had the same person, in the same online argument, make these two claims:

1. We're nowhere near "overpopulation," and scientists have figured out even when we reach 11B, we'll have room for each man, woman, and child to have more than one acre of land each.

2. "Illegals" are overcrowding the West, and there's no more room for the traditional (read white and Christian) residents of the US, Britain, France, Germany, and Sweden.

When I referred him back to his first point, he shouted, "GFY BUTTFUCKER TROLL!!!" and blocked me!

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"There is no bad weather, only bad clothes." - Unknown