The Childfree Life

When having it all, means not having kids
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 2:07 pm 
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^
Oh, OK.
I think failure rate of vascectomy is exceedingly low though. If it were me (and I appreciate that it's not) I would rather have that surgery which is readily available and cuts the risk to NEARLY 0% then pursue a procedure I would likely never be able to get.

Oh well, to each their own I guess.

-Rowan
If I won't be able to get it done, then I'll simply get a bilateral orchiectomy instead--if necessary, in an extremely dangerous "back-alley." Some aspiring eunuchs actually did get "back-alley" orchiectomies in the past since they could not get them done safely. I would really loathe to get a bilateral orchiectomy due to the need for lifetime HRT afterwards, though; thus, I am hoping for something less drastic than an orchiectomy but still more effective than a vasectomy.

Also, with all due respect, unlike you, I certainly don't have the option of abortion to fall back upon in the event of an unplanned pregnancy. Therefore, sterilization is the "do or die" moment for me. If the doctor doesn't do a good enough job sterilizing me, then he or she certainly isn't going to be responsible for 18+ years' worth of child support payments! :( That's going to be all on me--and you should all know just how much I hate the current extreme child support laws! :(


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 3:21 pm 
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I totally understand where you're coming from Cali, if I was a bloke I doubt I'd touch a woman unless I was absolutely, categorically convinced of her CF credentials and I'd taken my own extensive precautions.

As you say, women have options in the case of an unplanned pregnancy, men don't, they're at the mercy of the woman concerned.....that's not a risk I'd be willing to take and I'm eternally grateful I was born female in a country where I am in control and do have choices.

I wouldn't want to take the risk of being one of the 1% failures, especially as you won't know the procedure has failed until it's too late. Then, as you so rightly say, you have no alternative than get stuck with offspring you didn't want and all of the costs and aggro that comes with it.

I applaud that you're being so proactive and are actively addressing your concerns and desire to protect yourself by ensuring that a sterilisation has a zero failure rate.

_________________
Too bright to breed


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 4:39 pm 
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I totally understand where you're coming from Cali, if I was a bloke I doubt I'd touch a woman unless I was absolutely, categorically convinced of her CF credentials and I'd taken my own extensive precautions.
Yeah, with the current extreme child support laws, I have to completely abstain until I can actually this procedure done--and then I'll have to do a couple of semen analyses to see if sperm will finally clear out of my system.
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As you say, women have options in the case of an unplanned pregnancy, men don't, they're at the mercy of the woman concerned.....that's not a risk I'd be willing to take and I'm eternally grateful I was born female in a country where I am in control and do have choices.
Yep. Indeed, even after birth, you can exploit safe haven laws and I really don't know what your male partners are going to be capable of doing about this even if they want to raise your child themselves.
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I wouldn't want to take the risk of being one of the 1% failures, especially as you won't know the procedure has failed until it's too late.
Yeah, that's the problem with figures such as 1% or even 0.1%. Due to the law of truly large numbers, at least one failure is virtually guaranteed if you'll have enough people--and that one person could just as easily be you as it could be anybody else. Also, to my knowledge, there is no insurance to cover the cost of 18+ years' worth of child support payments and even if there was, I extremely strongly fear that some idiot judge could strike down such an insurance contract on grounds of public policy (perhaps based on the extremely spurious grounds that the child could be traumatized if he finds out that the insurance company rather than his father is paying his child support).
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Then, as you so rightly say, you have no alternative than get stuck with offspring you didn't want and all of the costs and aggro that comes with it.
Yep--and you could also get a good deal of slut-shaming, to boot! :(
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I applaud that you're being so proactive and are actively addressing your concerns and desire to protect yourself by ensuring that a sterilisation has a zero failure rate.
Yeah--though to be fair, I don't actually think that a bilateral epididymectomy has a zero failure rate. After all, the vas deferens could still grow and attach itself to the place on the testicle where the epiddymis used to be attached to. However, the odds of an accidental pregnancy are nevertheless likely to be much lower since one's sperm are simply not going to be motile enough to fertilize a woman's eggs. This is why AFAIK artificial insemination doesn't work with testicular (as opposed to epididymal) sperm--the sperm in the testicles simply aren't motile enough.

Of course, it would be even better if the entire vas deferens on both sides was removed together with the entire epididymis on both sides. However, that is going to be a much more invasive and likely expensive surgery and I certainly don't have tens of thousands of dollars to spend on this! Thus, I'll have to settle for what I can get at a relatively decent price--and that is likely going to mean the removal of my entire epididymis on both sides and the removal of my entire scrotal vas deferens on both sides but perhaps nothing beyond that. Still, even this is going to be much, much better than a simple vasectomy.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2019 6:25 am 
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Yeah, I guess i never really looked at it that way. I used to bemoan that fact that, as a woman, I have to deal with the possibility of pregnancy. Now I actually feel better about it because, yes, at least I have the control to do something about it.

I guess I feel lucky in some sense that neither I nor my husband need to worry about this too hard because we are definitely in 100% agreement on this and he does not have to fear me changing my mind. If anything, I am more militantly anti-baby then he even is.

That is, of course, one of your other options, Cali. Finding a childfree partner you can trust. Although I know if you desire 0% chance, then this will always be in the back of your mind.

-Rowan


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2019 2:03 pm 
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Yeah, I guess i never really looked at it that way. I used to bemoan that fact that, as a woman, I have to deal with the possibility of pregnancy. Now I actually feel better about it because, yes, at least I have the control to do something about it.
Yeah, women certainly have a lot more options than men have. Women have:

1. Bilateral salpingectomy
2. Hysterectomy
3. Abortion, followed by a repeat abortion if the first abortion fails, and so on
4. Safe haven laws

I suspect that all of these things are either exactly 100% effective or at least have less than a one in one million chance of failure. In contrast, vasectomies have a one in 2,000 chance of failure--which is just lovely given that, for a million men, there should be about 500 pregnancies. Lovely, just lovely! :( (Obvious sarcasm.)
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I guess I feel lucky in some sense that neither I nor my husband need to worry about this too hard because we are definitely in 100% agreement on this and he does not have to fear me changing my mind. If anything, I am more militantly anti-baby then he even is.
Yep, and that's certainly good for you two.
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That is, of course, one of your other options, Cali. Finding a childfree partner you can trust. Although I know if you desire 0% chance, then this will always be in the back of your mind.
Unfortunately, saying "I trusted her" certainly isn't an acceptable excuse to avoid paying child support for 18+ years afterwards. :( Indeed, the current extreme child support laws here in the U.S. encourage extreme mistrust in regards to this. :( After all, before she gets pregnant, a woman can say that a fetus is a worthless parasite, and after she gets pregnant, she could say that a fetus is a precious baby! :(

I could never trust someone to kill a cow--let alone kill something of the same species as themselves (even if it is non-sentient)! :(


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 17, 2019 3:03 pm 
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If anybody is in Indianapolis, I highly recommend Dr. Voelkel at Community. She was amazing. Sterilized me at 32 after only confirming with me once that this is what I wanted.


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